Reflections

Eucharisteo

2011-11-20T10:20:00.006-05:00

Dear Friends and family,
Recently my dear sister sent me a book, something which she has never done before; “One Thousand Gifts.” Receiving this book has been timely and Providential. Ann Voskamp’s book is about obtaining grace to live a life of thanksgiving (Eucharisteo). “What does a life of gratitude look like when your days are gritty, long and sometimes very dark?” She challenged herself to write a list of one thousand gifts from the Lord. This exercise was not just writing down “a few of her favorite things,” but finding the grace to be thankful for all things. I have been so inspired by this that I began my own eucharisteo list. I am sure I will discover one thousand gifts of my own, but for now my list is much shorter. May I share a short list of my current eucharisteo with you?

• A panoramic view of trees from my bedroom windows; they have become witnesses to my life and "clap their hands" (Is. 54)
• Cool wind blowing gently through my room-a plant quivers humbly under its invisible influence as I do under the gentle power of the Holy Spirit
• A sore foot that must be rested provides time for quiet consumption of life-filled words
• The presence of Grace apprehending every accusing thought
• Watching light and shadows shift in late afternoon; "there is no shadow of turning with Him"
• Stillness; "be still and know"
• Five and a half hours of uninterrupted sleep; "He gives His beloved sleep"
• Students to tutor; an outlet for teaching gift
• Page being turned by a sudden breeze
• The grief and sorrow bearing body of our Lord Jesus
• My husband on his way home
• A new life conceived
• Frosted grass crunching under footsteps
• That Jesus got it right for me
• Forgiveness of my sins and grace to forgive
• The six people who are called my children
• The five people who are called my grandchildren
• Peace in chaos
• A broken heart; "the Lord is near to those who have a broken heart"
• When I wake I am still with You-Ps.139:18

My final eucharisteo is for life long friends like you!
In His everlasting love,
Laurel

Hide and Seek

2009-08-08T12:55:00.000-04:00

We do not serve a “point and click” God. For this I am very grateful!!!!
How much capacity do we really have for the Lord and His presence?” We seek Him, (point and click), we find Him, (what an awesome website!) we run from Him, (is this or is this not one of Favorites?, no.), hide from Him, (we delete our history) and then when we can’t stand the separation and alienation any longer, we seek Him again, (point and click) we find Him again, etc., and begin the cycle all over again. At least this has been my own personal experience. I am “searching” for those who will do anything to increase their capacity for Him and His presence in our lives.
I ask the Lord for more of Him and His awesome presence in my life; He always shows up and answers me with His presence (“I will never leave you nor forsake you”)- I try to take Him at His word. I am ashamed to admit that I can’t handle His presence but for so long. I then begin to run, back-away, which is manifested in very small baby-steps backwards and then accelerated by more sophisticated avoidance behavior from Him, not because I don’t love Him, I do, I really do!!!!!, but because I am so completely overwhelmed physically and emotionally by His presence. My flesh can’t stand it!!!! It is at this very point of relational convergence that what the Lord desires for me is very different from what I desire from Lord. The divergence, or conflict of interest, is the subject of an entirely different discussion.
I am so glad and thankful that He is tolerant of my “hide and seek” ways. My broken and humble appeals for closeness with Him always end in acts of distancing myself from Him. I am no better than the Israelite s who played this hide and seek game with God throughout the entire Old Testament. The thing I don’t understand is that He is very patient with me when I do this. He never gets His feelings hurt, or displays frustration; He just continues to encourage me to seek Him again with the most kind and loving promises that I will find Him again and again.
Oh, Lord, remember that we are dust- You are God and we are NOT!!!!!

The Power of a Meal

2009-06-23T18:38:00.000-04:00

“He has given food to those who fear Him-He will ever be mindful of His Covenant.” Psalm 111:5
Currently, the preparation of every kind of food imaginable is a very popular form of entertainment; it is also one of the most wholesome forms of entertainment, no pun intended. Cooking is no longer considered the drudgery of the oppressed housewife but a sophisticated skill that has the potential to resolve every problem in one’s life and the power to make one rich and famous. Indeed, food is a very powerful spiritual, cultural, and social leveler; everyone must eat. All significant life events, especially holidays, are enhanced by signature foods. We don’t eat to nourish our bodies alone but we also consume food to satisfy our souls. If food is not consumed it has no value- it can give no sustenance. What we eat and who we eat with can change the lives of individuals, families, cities, and nations forever. The Old and New Testaments illustrate countless examples of the power of a meal.
Spiritual death came into the world because a meal of fruit was consumed by Adam and Eve from the tree of good and evil. The fate of Sodom and Gomorrah was negotiated over a barbeque dinner in front of Abraham’s tent. Esau exchanged his birthright for a bowl of lentil soup. Rebecca cooked a delicious meal for Isaac in order to deceive him and secure “the Blessing” for Jacob. The very night they were delivered from Egypt every Hebrew family was required to consume an entire Passover lamb. A poor widow obeyed the instructions of Elijah and saved her family from starvation during a famine. Queen Esther prepared two sumptuous sit down feasts for King Ahasharurus so that she might soften his idolatrous soul and gain his favor. She skillfully used culinary arts to save the Hebrew exiles from genocide. Never underestimate the power of a meal.
The New Testament dramatizes many stories of how food can be used to accomplish, teach, and demonstrate the power of a meal. Twice Jesus performed a fast food miracle for the multitudes of people who had followed Him into the desert. He served the Passover meal to His disciples before His crucifixion where He tenderly revealed to them what was about to occur. Twice, after His resurrection, the disciples did not recognize the Lord until food was served: once on the road to Emmaus and another when He had prepared a breakfast of fried fish for them. I am very sure that when the disciples ate together after He went back to heaven is when they missed Him the most. The communal meal is how the early church was established: they “broke bread from house to house, they ate their food with gladness of heart, praising God…” One day we will all sit down and eat with Him at the marriage supper of the Lamb. Can you imagine the power of that meal??!!!!!
Some of the most pivotal times of my life have been accomplished over a meal with someone or several someones. A few come to mind. My formative years as a Christian are owed to my spiritual mother who lovingly served me tuna fish sandwiches and Russian tea with huge amounts of wisdom and knowledge several times a week at her kitchen table. When we moved to Long’s in 1995, my husband and I determined to take our children out to dinner one night a week to establish a new family tradition. For some reason, the kids were very talkative and open about what was going on in their lives while seated around a table laden with chips, salsa, tacos, and tea. Some conversations were deeply spiritual, which delighted my husband and me. Several years ago, another significant event occurred over a meal with some friends. Our relationship had been fractured beyond repair at one point and the hope of reconciliation out of reach. We agreed to have communion (a meal of forgiveness) together in our living room and then sealed the new beginning with a very expensive meal. Our covenant friendship was renewed and has endured. Recently, Billy and I enjoyed a meal with Joseph and Debbie Holbrook. What a joy! We ate in an outdoor restaurant on the water; we prayed for each out loud other without closing our eyes, folding our hands, or bowing our heads. The Lord's presence was powerful. Currently, I enjoy a very wonderful friendship with Denise. Our friendship began over eight years ago at my kitchen table. Denise and her husband Leon agreed to accept an invitation for lunch with Billy and me. During the years following that initial meal together, Denise and I spent many hours sharing the deep things of the Lord and the challenging aspects of our lives, but never without a serving of food. Tears, laughter, and not a few prayers accompanied these covenant meals. Time has passed and our relationship continues to mature over wonderful servings of grub that both nourish our bodies and provide a reason for restoring each other’s souls. These meals have changed my life forever.
Summertime is fast approaching. Many of us will be sharing meals with a variety of people for a variety of reasons during these months. Every meal shared with those we love and with those we are in covenant with has the potential to change our lives and theirs forever. Never underestimate the power of a meal. Eat, drink and be merry for the kingdom of God depends on it! Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good!!!!!

what a coincidence

2009-03-17T15:49:00.000-04:00

This past Christmas I spent in Southern California with my sister Mary and her family. We decided to drive to Northern California to visit aging relatives during my visit. On the way back my sister pulled out of her prized music collection one of which was a DVD of Love Song's first album and a few other of the song writers mentioned by Joseph's post. She was so excited that we could relive our youth while driving on I-5 heading South on the Grapevine. For some reason I had a hard time going back. I did listen with interest and she and I sung along with a few of the ones we could remember the words to. Glad no one else was listening.
We became radical Christians in our mid-teens and those years were spent right in middle of the Jesus movement. We regularly attended Calvary Chapel on Friday nights when Love Song played for the hundreds of young people curious about God and church. I remember Chuck Smith very well, whose blue eyes sparkled and whose voice had a calming power to it while he taught us about Jesus. The little church sanctuary in Costa Mesa was always full; I'm sure they broke every fire code in the book. Every single pew was crammed with young bodies, some of them rather scarry looking, and every bit of floor space was occupied by more of the same. The building had glass walls on either side where hundreds more stood and looked in on the Friday night event. I can't believe that I was actually a part of this unprecedented outpouring of the Holy Spirit. But I was, and I am so thankful that I had the privilege of being a part of church history.
Unaware as I was of being a part of church history, I am more concerned now that I actually contributed to it. This is my hope.
Laurel

Day 4: "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down that wall!!!!!"

2009-03-12T17:57:00.000-04:00

These are powerful and familiar words to most of us who lived through the 80’s and early 90’s; words that invoke great emotion and joy. The command was a mandate given by President Reagan to Americans’50 year long nemesis and sworn enemy, the Soviet Union. When Pres. Reagan made this proclamation, it was not Mr. Gorbachev who took a pick and axe and began to “tear down” the Berlin Wall; it was the East and West Germans themselves who began to hack away at the thick and impenetrable great wall of divide that had kept those who were free from having any contact with those who were not. Why would government want to expose those who are living under a totalitarian government to one where “freedom” is the law of the land?
This is precisely what Satan would like to accomplish with his reign of tyranny in our lives. Even though Satan remains the Prime Minister of fear, bondage, etc., he does everything he can to keep us from the having any contact with those who are free with walls of lies that divide and separate us from one another, and most of all from HIm. Our Bible teachers continually proclaim: “Tear down that wall!!!!” But until we take the pick and axe of God’s word and begin to hack away at the “great walls” between imprisonment and freedom, we will remain behind the Iron Curtain of Satan’s oppressive and freedom-less rule.
Today, I make a proclamation: Dear Sisters in Christ, TEAR DOWN THOSE WALLS!!!!!!!!

Disclaimer: I have used an analogy that is “unfair,” but useful, regarding the Soviet Union. In my generation, the U.S. was considered a light in the darkness of the modern world, and indeed, I believe it has been. But, in the light of history, both theirs and ours, we must remember that Russia was once a devout Christian nation. My analogy in no way indicts the many godly and faithful Christians who loved and served the Lord, many of whom were martyred, in Russia during their lifetime. “Give honor where honor is due.”
I have got my pick and axe in hand, it red leather bond with frayed leaves and torn pages, and I am continuing by God’s grace to tear down the walls in my life. We labor together with Him in His work in our lives and on the battle field.
Let’s be one another’s advocates in tearing down the walls in each other’s lives!
Hacking away in His strength,
Laurel

Week 9 Day 3 "The Steadfast MInd"

2009-03-11T19:05:00.000-04:00

Day 3.
If anyone is guilty of having an overactive imagination it is me. That is why the phrase in I Cor. 10:5 has captured my thoughts. There are two very important things the Lord has revealed to me about myself this week. Both have to do with "captivating thoughts;" the kind that wear me out, cast me down, cause me no end of grief and pain. However, I promise you they are less so now than ever before, which means, they are taking the beating in Christ that they deserve.
First of all, I want to comment on how casual thoughts can become captivating (obsessive) thoughts. When I was at that stage of adolescence, when the body and self imagine is evolving rapidly, when an excessive amount of time and attention is spent in front of the mirror evaluating physical attributes and defects, when time is spent studying the most effective ways to improve or enhance them, I experienced a most traumatic abuse that made all that is natural or "casual" at that age to become a 40 year obsession. Never mind that I was very plain; I also had bad hair. My father was very much tormented in his mind and decided that my hair had to be cut nearly to the scalp. He forced my mother to cut my hair to a length that made him feel more comfortable. Mind you, my mother had no skills in hairstyling; she was afraid of my father and did what he said. The more I cried the more hair she was forced to cut off. This happened more than once. Needless to say, I became obsessed with my hair for decades after. Most women enjoy their time at a beauty shop, but after I had been to one in my adult life thinking that this was just what I needed to relax, I experienced nightmares for a couple days. Having my hair done by a professional became so difficult that I decided I would learn to take care of it myself. Consequently, I had a “bad hair” life until about 7 years ago. This is an example of how casual or natural thoughts can be taken captive by the enemy. Thankfully, I am finally free from obsessive thoughts about my hair, though I do try to make it look as good as possible for my age. I am now able to let professionals work their wonders on this old head of still very bad hair. It sure looks good now and I think it just might be my “glory.” (Corinthians) I thank the Lord for delivering me from this very debilitating obsession.
Secondly, if you could only know how I have “imagined” myself. I have been captivated by my own fantasies about who I should have been. I have imagined myself a Pulitzer Prize winner for writing (what I have written I am not quite sure), I have been the most powerful female speaker and teacher in modern Church history, I have been the most anointed soloist at every Christian growth conference (yes, I used to be a songwriter and worship leader). I have been the most beautiful and expressive dancer of spiritual truth, I have been the most awesome mother that ever there was, so much so that my children will dedicate there lives to writing about me after I’m gone, (Little House on the Prairie), I have outdone Gertrude Jeykyll by creating the most beautiful garden and landscape ever, so beautiful that public would even pay money to see it. I have been a librarian that has omniscient powers, I have contributed to the History of South Carolina by writing a history of Longs, from which I would receive recognition and honor for doing so; I have, well, you get the point. This may seem silly but I have obsessed about being these things. These are all vain "imaginations" and many remain personal goals. They are not evil, no, but they exalt themselves continually against who the Lord has made me to be, now, for such a time as this. I am His child, His handmaiden, His servant. That’s who I really am, and love it. "Let no man think of himself higher than he ought." Sometimes its not Satan who exalts himself against the knowledge of the Lord, but we who claim to be His servants. Laurel

Week 9: "The Steadfast Mind" Day 1

2009-03-10T07:22:00.000-04:00

Dear Sisters,
Beth has given us many definitions and interpretations of our memory verse in the original language that it makes me feel as if I were in a college English class. YESSSSSSS! I decided that I would look up the definition of the word “mind” in Roget’s Thesaurus just to add more options to the discussion. These words are commonly referred to as the vernacular, every day language in a particular culture. It is interesting that Mr. Roget, whose work was first published in 1911, has much to say about the definition of the “mind.” His considerations are based on not only the vernacular but also the secular world. These words and definitions make more sense to us who use modern English, rather than, the ancient Hebrew language when interpreting scripture. I don’t believe the Holy Spirit is held hostage to an interpretation that requires “theological scholarship,” since most of us have not had the option of being a seminary student. He is the teacher of the common man and woman; hey, that’s us! This does not mean that the study of original language is unimportant; it must be filtered and given to us in terms that are understandable. Miss Beth has done this exquisitely.
Here are some of the definitions given for the word mind: belief, desire, intellect, intention, memory, mood, psyche, spirit, theosophy, will, etc. It is safe to say that our minds are very complex organs, and hold capacity for a great many activities of thought. If spiritual warfare takes place in the realms of these, and I believe it does, we need to pay careful attention to our own beliefs, desires, intellects, etc., to determine how the enemy may use them to defeat us. I am going to prayerfully incorporate these aspects of the mind while studying this week.
Thinking about you all,
Laurel

Day 3: The Fullnes of Unfailing Love

2009-03-02T19:16:00.000-05:00

Week 8: Day 3-“The Fullness of Unfailing Love”
It was just last week that I spent several hours in my yard pruning landscape materials and making some preparations for the coming season-that rapid succession of growth that our climate is famous for. There was a tree which had been allowed to grow in a location that was not intentional, this is usually what we refer to as neglect. I was able to saw off the branches, cut down the main trunk, and dig down deep enough to discover the tap roots beneath the soil hoping to loosen them and finally get that dag-gon tree dug up. I attempted to use an axe to cut the roots loose, but I was not strong enough. Just imagine an old woman with an axe hacking away at 5 inch thick roots in the ground; not a pretty sight. The stump remains rooted and grounded!
I know that there is nothing strong enough to cut the roots of God’s love out of my life.
We were asked to read Ephesians 3:14-21 and then describe and draw a representation of how “rooted you would estimate your life right now in the soil, or assurance, of God’s love.” I am surer of God’s love for me than anything else in my life. I am not an artist but if you could see the drawing I did in the margin of the study it would be obvious to you that what is growing beneath the soil is proportionately deeper than the height of what is growing or visible above the surface of the earth. There are more roots than branches and leaves. I am not sure what that means. I just know He loves me, He has proved it over and over and over again. His love is the foundation of my life.

Laurel

Welcome to "God's Unfailing Love:" Week 8

2009-03-01T17:37:00.000-05:00

Welcome dear sisters,
This blog is available to any and all of you who just can't wait until Friday morning to share what the Lord is showing you or speaking to you during the week. By now we have seen that each day of the study is very different and will have a particular impact on each of us according to where we are in our journey towards "Breaking Free."
Blogging is easy. Don't be intimidated by its technical character. You will be sharing with friends and sisters. You can remain anonymous if you wish. There is no need for me to establish rules or guidelines because I know you will all be loving and respectful in responding to one another. To begin our discussions, I will post first. If you want to respond, or begin another topic, just click on the "comment" link and this will take you to the discussion page. All the directions for posting are there and easy to follow.
I will facilitate conversation and comment regularly on posts. Please be at ease. There are no right or wrong answers, no grading of expressions, no judging of thoughts. For the sake of clarity, identify the day which you are commenting on so that we can understand the context of your thoughts and experience.
Your participation in not required; you are free to participate as much or as little as you like.
My email address is on the front page of "Reflections;" if you need to ask any questions or need assistance of any kind, please feel free to let me know how I can serve you.

Laurel